A Father's story
by quillofthoth
Summary: One day a hunter named John knocks on Bobby's door. Two boys are in the car. These boys will change Bobby's life, and he will change their's.
1. The Beginning

Father's Story

Parents always fail their children, Bobby's father had beat him, his mother had sat by. Boddy knew that parents always failed their children. He had never wanted children, he knew he would be just like his father, he never regretted not having them, but the pain it caused his wife, that he regretted.

He met John Winchester the same way he met almost every other hunter. John knocked on his door, and when he opened it he let him in, gave him a drink (laced with holy water) and started giving him the talk. Iron, Salt, Holy Water, Silver. He gave him two daggers, kitchen salt, a cross, a shotgun and a pile of business cards for everything from FBI to CIA.

He felt bad for him, Bobby had a particularly hatred of demons, he understood the pain of losing your wife, he had no idea that he had just met the man that he would hate more than any demon. He got up to grab a drink for the two of them to celebrate, and he looked out the window. There sat a Impala, and in the back seat was a small face staring at him.

He stared back at the small boy, he brought the drinks over to John. "Is that your son in the car?"

"Yeah," John said.

"You want to bring him in?"

John shrugged.

"I'll feed you both dinner before you go. Your not going to get many more decent meals."

The two of them went out to the car. They opened the door the small boy was mushing a banana into a french fire box with a plastic fork. He straightened up as the door opened " I'm ready, Dad."

"Ready for what?" Bobby asked.

The boy looked him straight in the eye. "Anything."

A whining filled the air, and for the first time Bobby looked across from the boy and saw the backwards facing car seat. The too big baby stuffed into it. The boy reached out "It's okay, Sammy." He said unfasten it and pushing the french box off his lap, he picked up the baby that seemed half his size. "It's okay."

"Come on, Dean" John said "He going to give us a free dinner."

Dean got out of the car, holding Sam with both arms. " Okay." He shifted the baby and picked up the french fries box.

Bobby sat the three of them down at the table, he found a chocolate bar and he handed that to Dean. Who was spoon feeding Sam the mashed banana " Can I talk to you for a moment, John?"

"Sure." They walked out to the living room.

"You didn't say you had kids."

"I didn't think it was important."

"Of course, it was important. What are gonna do with them? You can't take kids hunting!"

"I won't, I'll put them someplace safe."

"And who's going to take care of them? Uh, They're kids, that one can't even walk! How are you going to take care of them when you are hunting?"

"Look, I appreciate your help, and your dinner. But this is my life and my kids lives, and you don't get to tell me how to live it."

"Your kids better live long enough to get to."

John marched back into the kitchen and Bobby followed, before he got a chance to drag the kids out the door, Bobby had asked Dean what he wanted for dinner.

When John left with his kids after dinner, Bobby told him that hunters were hunters and there was no reason to get worked up over one little disagreement. Really the only reason he wanted him to come back was those kids. He didn't want them to die because of one man's fool cradude.

"No, I can't watch your kids for two week, what do I look like to you a Nanny?"

"I have nowhere else to put them."

"I've got an idea, why don't you take care of them, and I'll call up a different hunter that won't need to bring a diaper bag with them."

"People are burning to death we don't have the time, it's only two weeks and I'll never ask you to watch them again."

"Alright, alright, let's see the idjits."

John called to Dean and Sam, and Dean led Sam in. The boy was walking now still unsteady on toddler feet.

"Be good." John said and the door slammed shut.

Dean clutched Sam's hand tighter, and stared at Bobby " We won't be any trouble."

Bobby nodded and for the first time felt a completely lost, he didn't know the first thing about kids. "Right."

"Where are we going to sleep?"

This kid was bloody smarted then he was. He hadn't even taking a second to think of that. He had a few spare army cots, and a couple of rooms that he just kept books and weapons in, in would be pretty easy to move the weapons out of one of them and a cot in. "Come on, we'll go and clean out a room for you two."

Dean didn't even look surprised as they cleared out the room, as he carried knives and shotguns out and into the next room, he sorted through them the same way a mother sorts through socks, all the while he watched Sam who seemed content to sit on a chair and fall into a half sleep. Bobby wondered what John had done to these boys to make them so obendiet, so afraid. Bobby didn't like the way he looked at Dean and saw himself.

"Who takes care of you when your Dad's away?" Bobby asked, trying to sound calm.

"We're fine."

"Let's take a break, kid."

They grabbed Sam and headed downstairs, Bobby grabbed three beers, paused, and put two of them back. "What do you want to drink?"

"Sam likes apple juice if you have any."

Bobby looked into his fridge. No, no apple juice. He took out a thing of milk, and put it on the table. He grabbed two glasses out of the cupboard and put them down. "We'll buy apple juice tomorrow."

Dean nodded, and reached out picking up the gallon jug with both hands he careful poured out two glasses, he took a drink from one glass, then he held his brother with one arm and helped him take a drink. " Sippy cups too." Bobby muttered. Bobby was under the belief system that hunters shouldn't have children. Yet, he knew some hunters who really tried, who would never have walked out without leaving their children as much as a change of clothes.

"Look boy, I'm not like the rest of the people who ask where your Daddy is. I'm a hunter, I'm not about to turn him into the cops. I know the hunting life. I just want to who takes care of you while he's out."

"He has a lot of babysitter he leave us with if he'll be gone for too long. Sometimes I watch Sam"

"How long is too long?"

"Like three days or more."

"So you watch him for a couple of days."

"Yeah," Dean said, seeming to relax a little. " I take care of him."

" What do you do?"

"Everything."

Sam was wiggling in his chair. " Dee, play."

Dean shifted in his chair, glancing at Bobby uncomfortable, "Is there anything you need me for ?"

"Na, go play."

Bobby mostly went about life as usual for the next couple days he answer his phone calls and screamed into the phone. He had made one quick trip into town for apple juice, sippy cups and dipures. He grabbed a handful of toys off the rack. He introduced Sam and Dean as his nephews to the overly curious cashier, and when he got back into the car he told them that when people were around they should call him Uncle Bobby. He had offered to help take care of Sam, thinking it wasn't right to have a five year old acting like a single father. But Dean had told him he could handle it. They came down for meals, but mostly stay locked but in the room he'd cleaned out for them, he barely heard a noise even if he was standing outside the door. But Bobby couldn't forget that there were kids in the house no matter how much they tried. He would reach for a beer bottle and pull back, remembering pulling a sharp of glass out of his own skin.

He couldn't drink with them around, couldn't bring himself to talk to them, and couldn't get the thought of them out of his head. He thought about calling Rufus, just for someone to talk to, but knew that they were hunting buddies and not each other emotional support system. He didn't need a shoulder to cry on, he need to get through these two weeks without beating these kids bloody.

He went upstairs, and looked into the boys' room. Sam was asleep, laying face down on the rug. Dean was pushing a toy car he bought on the rug. " Why are you boys so quiet all the time?" He asked.

"Did we do something wrong?" Dean asked looking up with wide eyes as though he already knew the answer… and the consequences.

"No, no." It was own fault coming up here and bothering them like they needed his help. "Where'd you learn to do all this anyway?"

"What." He had sat up like he was a soldier called to attention, the car forgotten.

"Change a diaper, feed a baby, put him to sleep, play with him."

The boy looked away and a second passed before he spoke. "It's my job to take care of him." He said, so quiet that Bobby barely heard.

It was Bobby's belief that if you would told something often enough, it became truth, more than truth, it became your only truth, after all he did break everything that he touched, he had broken his wife heart, right before he stabbed her in the heart, now he was a hunter, he made it his job to break things. It was those words that broke something in Bobby, he said it as though it was a simple fact, like he couldn't do anything to change it. These were the words that would shape Dean Winchester's life, and Bobby wasn't going to allow that to happen.

"What do you want for dinner, kid, I'll make whatever."

"Whatever, fine."

"I want an answer." He said and regretted it the moment he did, for the boy's eyes widen and he nodded. "Yes, sir."

"No, that's not what I meant." Bobby resisted the urge to hit his head against the wall. " I want to know what you want for dinner, because I get the feeling you don't get it often."

"Mac and cheese." Dean didn't look at him, but the words were spoken. That was progress. "If it's not too much trouble."

As Dean came down to dinner that night, he smiled for the first time that Bobby had seen, the next few days were better. Dean would play with Sam outside or in the living room, instead of locked away upstairs. Dean was less afraid of Bobby, and Bobby of Dean.

"Can you teach me to do that?" Dean asked watching Bobby make breakfast one morning. As he and Sam rolled a ball back and forth to each other.

"Make scrambled eggs? You'll a bit young to be working a stove…" Bobby trailed off staring at Dean realizing what he was staying. This boy was left alone to care for his younger brother for days at a time, of course he wanted to know how to cook. "Why not? Come here and I'll show you."

So after that they cooked together, Bobby taught him to make eggs, pancakes and Mac and Cheese. It was nice actually because when he had to answer a phone, Dean would make sure his breakfast didn't burn. Washing the dishes one day, Bobby looked out the window and saw the two kids sitting on a car lid, and he got an idea, he went to his garage and got out a piece of rope and a tire, and bought it out for them he tied it up on a tree showed it to Sam and Dean, Dean was pushing Sam on it when the Impala drove in and honked. Dean pulled Sam off the swing and walked over to the car, they got in. John rolled down the window "Thanks, Bobby."

"Don't you worried about it, I'll be glad to have them back sometime."

"Great, well I better be going, but that one less filthy ghost hanging about."

Bobby nodded and watched them drive away, unable to stop the sick feeling in his stomach. And unable to shake the thought out his head, that Dean hadn't gotten a turn on the tire swing.

That's how the next years went. He taught Dean to read, cook and even began showing him how to fix cars. He played with Sam, moved guns and knives out of his reach, and realizing the boy was figure it out on his own taught him to read too. He respected John's wish to not let the younger child know about the real world, and put 90% of his book's out of the child's reach as well, only leaving the ones that were not in English. The boys went from being 5 and a little over a year, to being ten and six. He took care of them a week here, a month there.

The impala drove up and John got out and started walking towards the door, Bobby opened it, handing him a beer as way of greeting and watched as he drank from it it without a reaction to the holy water. Dean came in holding Sam's hand with he released as they entered "Uncle Bobby, tell Dean I'm not a kid anymore I don't need to hold his hand !" Sam said. John shot him a look and he silenced. Bobby trailed his eyes over the two boys, looking for signs of bruises. They were often there and this time was no exception, Dean had a bruise on his cheek. Bobby turned back to John holding back his anger by a thread. "Long time no see, How was your business ?"

"It was… a killer deal." John said, " I wanted to borrow some of your books."

"Help yourself, just show me which ones you taking."

He watched John walk off, before turning his attention back to the kids. "How's life been?" He asked, expecting them to jump into their usually tales. But either of them did. Dean looked away, out the window. Sam asked quietly "Are we staying with you Uncle Bobby?"

"That good, uh?"

"Sam," Dean hissed at him " Don't bother him, you heard Dad, I'm old enough to take care of you myself."

So that was John's latest game. Too bad Bobby wasn't going to play. "Lucky for you boys I don't count, uh? Of course you staying with me. Go out and play now, I've got a few thing to go over with your father." He paused for a moment and then said " Oh and Dean?"

"Yeah?"

"How long was your father gone?"

"It was only supposed to be a week." Dean muttered, not looking at him.

"How long was it?" Bobby pressed, watching him with a sinking feeling.

"Two and a half." Dean said glancing at him to see his reaction. But it was what Bobby saw that scared him. It was the hollow look in the boy's eyes, something had broken inside of him, no, something had already broken, now it was gone altogether, someone had taken something from this boy, and he wasn't going to be able to get it back.

"Alright, head on outside."

"Yes, sir." Dean said and they headed out. Bobby shook his head as those little words he tried so hard to get rid of still seemed to slip out now and then.

" How Dean get hurt?" He asked John walking into the study.

"He disobeyed me." John said without looking up. Somehow Bobby doubted it, Dean would shoot himself on John's orders, but now wasn't the time to press the matter.

"So you leaving the boys alone now."

"They're old enough for it."

" Will you be taking them when you go?"

"Yup."

" Idjit."

John's eyes snapped up to met his "What?"

"I said you're an idjit." Before John could pulled out the knife he'd given him to kill him with. Bobby continued "I've got tons of land so that Dean can practices shooting. I've got more books for him to read then any library. I'm a hunter and you try to find someone you can keep them safer. And you going to dump them in a dirty hotel room?"

"You want to teach Dean how to shoot?"

"I know for a fact you already have, but practice couldn't hurt, now could it?"

"Alright, I'll leave them with you, Dean needs to work on his double barrel, anyway. Don't let Sam find out."

Bobby nodded, let John take all the books he wanted and saw him to the door as quickly as possible. He wasn't sure how much longer he could stand the sight of that man. He'd gotten to kept the kids for now anyway.

He brought the kids into town the next day, bringing Sam to the library he let him carry out as many books as he could hold. Sam had always had a passion for dogs and so it was no surprise that half the books were about dogs. Next he brought them both ice cream and then dragged them to the park. He found Sam a nice spot under a tree to read and told Dean they were going to play ball.

True to form Dean intisted started arguing, saying his Dad told him to practice with a double barrel.

"We going to skip the guns today, today you throwing around a ball like any regular snot nosed little jerk." Just for today he thought, let them be kids for one day.

They throw around the ball and ran about swinging bats, until the sun went down. At first Dean was holding himself back, unwilling to enjoy an active that his father hadn't ordered, but slowly he forgot and threw himself into the game. He laughed, shouted, he took pride in being able to run circles around Bobby, swinging the bat with all the force his ten year old self could muster. Sam got dragged into the game at some point and when that happened all rules were forgotten. It was just the three of them laughing.

The next day Dean took the double barrel outside, and Sam sat on the couch reading a sim chapter book about a stray dog.

Bobby had made a quick call to Rufus telling him to cover the phone lines, while he had the boys. Then had sat down at a window where he could keep one eye on Dean and watch Sam read. Bobby flipped through book after book trying to find out how to kill a wrath.

He noticed Sam kept on looking over at him.

"What is it?"

"Is Dad a bad man?"

The question took completely off guard, he had always assumed that Sam, like Dean thought their father was perfect. He should have known better, Sam was nothing like Dean.

"What makes you think that?"

"He gets drunk and he hits us, he goes away for really long times, and Dean worries even if he tries to hide it, he not like the daddies in my books, he… I don't think he likes us."

Bobby nodded, trying to find an answer. If they won't hunters this would so easy. He could call up the police, report child abuse and be done. But they were hunters and hunters were outside the law, hunters dealt with their own matters. He could kill him, or report him to the police anyway, but both would make every hunter he had never met turn on him. So how could he tell this child, that yes, his father was a bad man, but he had to stay with him anyway?

"Your Father, cares about you in his own way." Bobby said " He goes away because he need to for work, you know that." Every word tasted sour.

Sam nodded, retreating back into his book, without looking at Bobby and Bobby knew he had failed. The boy was more alone in the world then never. That was when Bobby realized he had to get these boys away from John.

It was two weeks before he saw John again, or more accurately heard the impala honking outside. "John," He called from the door, putting a hand out to stop Dean and Sam from leaving "Get in and give me back my books."

John got out of the car, and went to the back, where the books had been thrown in with all the rest of the weapons. He walked over and handed them back to Bobby "Thanks."

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" Bobby asked.

"I don't really have time-"

"You already know where your next hunt is?" Bobby asked knowing full well, John wouldn't have come back if he already had another hunt.

"No-"

"Then come in."

John walked in. He lead him upstairs and into the room that had become the boy's bedroom. There where toys and children's books. Dean's toy soldiers laying on top of Sam's _Make Way for Ducklings._ "Leave them here."

"What?"

" Permanently, leave them here permanently."

"They're my sons, why would I do that?"

"Because you don't care that they're your sons! Because you're turning them into soldiers and Sam doesn't even know why! Because you to busy making sure they can kill to check if they've eaten!"

"How dare you speak to me like that, I take care of them! You want me to tell Sam that he living in a world of monsters, that boy's afraid of the dark! That boy's afraid there's something under his bed!"

"Maybe if you didn't hand him a shotgun to shoot it with he wouldn't be!"

"They're my sons, I can do with them what I want."

"I can train them to be hunters here, you won't need to worried about it, they will be hunters. But leave them here, you won't need to worried about them all the time, you can go from one hunt to the next without having to pick them up or enroll them in school. I can have them go to school here, once they graduate, they'll hunt, you can still come by and see them whenever you want. But if you care about them at all about them, let them stay."

"If I care about them at all!" John was screaming at him. Bobby hoped the boys had gone outside so they didn't need to hear this. "They are my sons, I know what's best for them! I take care of them, and I'm done with you babying them all the time!"

John turned and whirled out of the room. It was all Bobby could do to stay he stared out the window and saw the boys get in the car, he looked over to the gun hanging on the wall inching to take in down. But instead he watched the Impala drive away, this time it was Sam's face staring out of the window. He placed his hand on the window, like he was trying to reach him.

It was not the last he saw of Sam and Dean, far from it. Only two years later Sam learned of monsters and with that about the demon that killed the boys' mother. Shortly after that John began to bring Dean on hunts, letting him hunt at only twelve. Sam now being left only for days at a time, struggling through mountains of homework, Bobby would be on the phone with him for hours getting him through everything. His phone calls with Dean would be brief and to the point. "How do you kill _ Monster." Answer. Hang up. Repeat. John was chaotic and undecided. In one town he would enroll both in school, the next he would take Dean hunting with him. The next he would leave both but forget to enroll them in school.

When Dean was sixteen he was caught and sent to a reform place for two months, Bobby learned this by Sam knocking on his door, Sam explained everything to him in a resigned tone. Bobby took Sam in and enrolled him in school. He told him this was his chance to be normal for a bit and signed him up for soccer. Sam complained about having enough to do but relented and signed up, he made friends, he seemed to forget about his father and brother. It fact picking him up from practice once, Bobby heard someone ask Sam why he lived with his Uncle, Sam responded, "My parents are dead, house fire."

Bobby wondered, was it just a convent excuse, or a deep down desire? When John came back two months later. He showed him the Trophy that Sam had won, something flicker across John's face. Pride? Regret? Bobby wasn't sure, it had been so long since he believe this man to be capable of any human emotions.

John reached out a hand automatically to take the trophy from Bobby's hand and Bobby gave it to him, John stared at it for a second before shaking his head "Sam, get down here! We need to pick up your brother!"

Sam came down the stairs will his backpack thrown over his shoulder, looking like any other grumpy teenager being dragged off to do something they didn't want to do. "Can't I stay here?" He asked.

"No, I don't have time to come back for you, get it the car. And I'm sir to you."

"Yes, Sir."

Bobby fist curled at his side.

As Sam stared out the back window, back at Bobby. Bobby realized that Sam hadn't been asking if he could stay a while longer. He was asking if he could stay.

"Bobby!" John shouted as he opened the door, behind him stood his two sons. Tall and strong. Young men now. "I have a lead!" His eyes shone it such a way there was no doubt what he was talking about. "I'm leaving the boys here."

"Me?" Dean sounded shocked and who could blame him, he was twenty, old enough to hunt, old enough for vengeance. "Dad, you need back up, you need me!"

"I don't need distraction, Dean. You're staying with Sam."

"No, I can-"

"Listen to me. You would only slow me down. This is an order you are going to stay here, you not going to come after me. You take care of you brother. Do you understand me?"

Dean's face twisted, he looked at the ground "Yes, sir."

"Thanks, Bobby." John said " Be good, Sam."

He turned and walked away.

It had been years since Bobby had seen the boys for longer than an instant. They would drop by and grab books, and be gone again. They were old enough that they didn't need to be babysat, and Dean was always hunting with his father.

"Hey, Bobby." Dean said looking towards him after watching the Impala drive away.

"Dean, Sam. Nice to see you again. How you boys been?"

"Hunting." Dean said, failing to notice the question had been about his emotional state.

"Sam?"

Sam sighed "I had a test today."

Bobby glazed at Sam for a second, what went on in that boy's head? How did that boy look between life and death and school, and always have school come out on top?

Dean glared at Sam "A test? That's what your thinking about now? This is it, the thing that killed Mom!"

"Yeah, and where are we, are we with Dad? No, look around you Dean, he ditched us again!"

"Sam," Bobby cut in "It's thursday, let's see if we can get you enrolled for next week should we? Dean, I've got a car in the garage that needs to be looked at, you mind?"

"With the junk you drive? Yeah, I mind, probably take me a week just to have it running again." But he turned and headed off to fix a car that Bobby hoped would take at least two.

He let Sam in, " How you doing? Really?"

Sam throw his backpack on the couch. "I'm fine."

Bobby decided to step on the landmine "How's your dad?"

Sam's back stiffen "He's great, found a new hunt, got a lead. Even got to leave town."

"Had another fight did you?"

"Kinda."

"What happened?"

Sam looked over at him, then away. "Dean got in between us, told me to stop being a baby. "

Bobby studied Sam's face, no bruises. Dean broke it up in time then.

Sam watched Bobby watching him "Why are you a hunter, Bobby?"

Bobby's wife limp body flashed through his mind, but that wasn't what Sam was asking, he didn't care what had gotten him started, he wanted to know why he stayed. "You break everything that you touch." Ran through his mind, but that wasn't what the boy needed to hear.

"It works for me, I can help people in my way, But there are a lot of ways to help people, Sam. Everyone desires a chance to pick their path."

"Dad says if you're in the hunter life, you're in for life."

"Your Father's right." Sam looked at him, shocked. "But you and your brother, you never picked this life. You still have a chance to pick another life, a better one. It's too late for your Dad and me, for those like us, but not for you. So let's call the high school shall we?"

Sam nodded, and Bobby spent the next two hours on the phone, explaining that, yes, he was enrolling his nephew in school, again, and why, what was the problem with that? He stayed calm though instead of screaming at the phone like he would for the poor offices calling to check his "FBI" Because this wasn't fake, and Sam was watching him.

After telling Rufus to cover the phones, he went out the garage. "How is it?" He asked Dean who was deep under the hood. "Rusted piece of junk, what else would it be? It's one of your cars." Came Dean's response.

"Get out from there."

Dean stood up, "What?"

"I enrolled Sam in school."

"Great, thanks."

They stood there, practically strangers despite their past, separated by a wall of John, his actions, his lies, his mistakes. That had turned them into strangers.

"I would have let you go."

"No, Dad was right, I would have just gotten in the way."

Bobby looked at him, what did John do to his head?

"You really believe that?"

Dean nodded, then shook his head "No, I could have help, I could have listen to him, I would have listened to him, I would have done any-" He cut himself off. "It doesn't matter."

Bobby shook his head at the half person, half mindless soldier in front of him.

"Right, well if you need to talk…"

"Only thing I need is to fix this junk car of yours."

Bobby nodded and left Dean to it, he went back in. Was this really what he got to do, pick of the pieces and try and fall to put Sam and Dean back together after John's latest mistake? How long could any of them take this? He opened the fridge and grabbed a beer.

" Uncle Bobby, can I have juice or something?"

"Sure," He looked in the fridge and pulled out milk, once again not having juice "This do?"

"Yeah," Sam took it from him and opened the cupboard, grabbing a cup. He sat at the table. Bobby looked at the beer in his hand, then at the boy sitting in innocence at the table. He wasn't that much older then Bobby had been that night...So long ago. He heard as if it was that night the crashing sound of a broken plate. He jumped. "Bobby, you okay?" Sam asked, looking surprised.

"Fine." He put the beer back. He got a glass out of the cupboard and sat down, "Anything you've been having trouble figuring out at school?"

The weeks past quickly, Sam caught with his school work and mention to Bobby that this school was his favorite, because he gone to it more then once, he had caught up with one of the boys that had been on his soccer team and they were talking again.

Bobby would wake up and find Dean asleep on his couch, never having come in the night before. He would be up before Sam and in the garage. He was working through the piles of broken cars lying around at such a rate that Bobby was wondering if any would be left when John came back. If John came back, it was becoming more of an if everyday, they all knew it. Dean was pacing, Bobby was worried, not for John, but for the boys if he didn't return.

Sam seemed mostly unbothered, more worried about school and his new friend then his Father's fate. Dean claimed Sam wasn't letting himself think about, he was too young to realize that their father could die. But once again Bobby wondered, remembered Sam claiming his father was dead.

Dean checked his phone and paced, he fixed cars and checked to see if his father had left anything for them. He worried. And looked for cases, not that helped him find his father, but it seemed to be all he could think to do.

And then one morning Dean was gone.

It shouldn't have surprised Bobby, Dean had mentioned that he shouldn't have let John go alone, he had said he should go after him. But each time Bobby had thought he talked him out of it. He had been alert, but Dean hadn't memsion the idea in two days and Bobby wanted to believe that he was letting it go.

But Dean loved his father, loved the man that beat him, the man he feared and protected his brother from. He thought he was the best person in the world, so of course he had gone after him, he would give his life for him.

"Where's Dean?" Sam asked walking in from school. He was looking at Bobby's face, worry coating his own.

"Long gone, he went after your father."

Sam turned away. " Do you think he's still alive?" He asked, his voice was almost neutral, only the slightest quiver giving him away, but was it hope or fear?

"I don't know, but either way your brother's putting himself in harm's way for nothing. Promise me you won't go after him, Sam."

Sam looked at him, "I promise." He said, resigned.

"Nothing we can do now, I've already told all my contacts to keep an eye out for him. We'll get your brother back."

Now Sam worried, his first action when he got home from school was to ask if he'd heard from Dean, he got frustrated with his school work, calling it pointless, which Bobby had never heard him do before, Bobby overheard him praying at night, asking God to bring Dean home.

Missing from his questions and pleads to God was any mention of his father, so when Sam asked him "If Dad doesn't come back, can I say here?" Instead of telling him that John would come back, like he would do for Dean, he said "You're always welcome here, you know that."

Sam was sitting at the table, working on his math. Bobby was on the phone "Can't you read, if their Badge says they're FBI. WHAT DO YOU THINK THEY ARE? Don't waste my time again."

It was the noise that alerted, the tires screeching, the yelling, they ran out onto the porch, staring in horror, Bobby's car was at the porch, the impala was behind it, still running, door ajar, Dean lay on the ground, covering his head with blood splattered arms, John was standing above him, shotgun raised, glinting like a sword, dripping with blood, he brought down the butt again.

Dean grunted.

"No," Bobby said, no one looked at him, no one heard him.

"It was my chance, my chance, you got in my way, you-" John was yelling, hitting Dean over and over, completely blind to his audience.

Bobby walked back inside almost robotically, he grabbed the nearest gun from the wall and walked back outside.

"Dad, stop." Sam was in between John and Dean, grabbing the gun John was holding. John shoved him to the side, knocking him onto the ground, still holding the shot gun.

"The boy said to stop." Bobby said, as he walked down the steps.

John turned, and saw Bobby with his gun.

"What are you doing?"

"Get away from that boy."

"Or what?"

"Or I'll shoot you."

"Didn't look did you? Gun's rocksalt."

Bobby cocked the shotgun. "Good thing you so sure, 'Cause I'm not. Get away from Dean."

"He's my son, I'll-"

Bobby shot. The shot wasn't aimed at John, it hit the Impala. John was right, it was rocksalt.

He aimed it at John "Get off my property before I blast you into kingdom come."

John took a step back, fear in his eyes for the first time since Bobby had met him.

"In the car" He said to the boys already pulling the driver's door open.

"Don't-" Bobby said, but Dean was already pushing Sam into the back, before he fell into it himself. John hit the gas.

Bobby ran after the Impala, emptying his gun, firing at it, screaming himself raw, ordering John to give him the boys, the boys John sired, the boys John trained, the boys John beat, the boys Bobby cared for, the boys Bobby taught, the boys Bobby raised, Bobby's sons.

 _AN : I do not own Supernatural. But I find Bobby a wonderful character, and I wanted to show his struggles raising Sam and Dean, both from his own past and from John. Please Review._


	2. A New Addition

It had been six months since Bobby had last seen the Winchester boys. Six months since he had driven John off his land. He cursed himself every day for it. He wanted to protect those boys, not drive them away, if he had just held his temper- Dean would be dead, he reminded himself. Should have put a bullet through his brain he thought bitterly like he had wanted to so many times; but the thought of pulling the trigger, John's head spattering over his yard, seeing the looks on the boys faces- the look on Dean's face- digging a hole in the backyard and trying to pretend it never happened. It made him sick, he saw it so clearly, the shot, the scream, and Dean's face mirroring his own mother's. Dean wouldn't forgive him, just like his mother hadn't, and he would have dragged Sam away from him and he would have lost them just the same, and that shouldn't have mattered to Bobby because they would at least be safe, but he couldn't pull the bloody trigger. Not that it mattered in the least, as he had grabbed the wrong gun anyway.

Bobby took another drink of whiskey next to him. It was all he was doing as of late: drinking and he had even stopped answering the phone, he could barely call himself a hunter anymore, looking in the mirror only allowed his father to stare back at him.

In his dreams they became one: sometimes his father beat him, sometimes John, sometimes it was John he shot, other times his father, but it was always John who pulled his boys away from him. When he woke he helped himself to another bottle of whiskey.

He was opening an empty fridge when a noise alerted him that someone was outside. He grabbed his gun from the wall and headed outside, he moved silently, following the noise of something hiding among his broken cars, he crept forwards raising his gun, he turned the corner, seeing something he shot- A loud yelp filled the air, and the dog took off running. Bobby cursed, dropped his gun and took off after the mutt.

It was faster than him, but it was his junk yard and he knew every inch of it, he cornered the mutt under a car, then leaned down and dragged it out. It whined loudly struggling to get away from him.

It was filthy, missing patches of fur, he checked it for a collar, but it had either lost it or had never had one. The dog whined, scratching at him to get away. "I'm trying to take care of you, you dumb mutt." He said, not that anyone cared when he did that, the dog would probably prefer to go running back to whatever owner had left him in this state, probably had dropped him on the side of the road and didn't look back.

He dragged the dog inside and dropped it on the floor. It ran off and hid under the couch, he got a bowl of water and cooked up some chicken and put it on the floor for him. The dog stayed under the desk. He moved the food closer. The dog put it's nose behind its paws. He sat on the couch for hours staring at the dog, the dog did not come out.

Bobby woke up to bright sunlight shining in his eyes, he sat up, looking around the living room as though something was lurking there, he heard a noise coming from the kitchen, and got quietly to his feet. He moved into the kitchen pulling a gun down from the wall. Aiming it- at the dog that was happily eating from a ripped open bag of bread lying on the floor.

"Dumb mutt." He said, lowering the gun, "stop that." He leaned down and picked up the bag of bread, looked at the ripped opened side and torn bits inside, and dropped the bag on the ground again, "Fine, enjoy it." He said, but the dog had backed away, and was eyeing him, wide eyes filled with mistrust. Just like Dean's eyes had been so long ago. He shook his head, it was a dog, not Dean, not anyone. A dog. "Whatever" he said and turned and walked back into the living room picking up his bottle, he sat in his chair and flipped to a page on werewolves, he knew deep down in was pointless, he had this passage memoized and he was fairly sure Rufus was handling the phones because he hadn't touched them in weeks. But he had to pretend to be a hunter, that he did something of meaning in his life because if he didn't… If he wasn't doing any good, if he was just breaking everything... then what right did he have to be alive?

He cooked a burger that night, awaking sometime after the sun had set, and as he cooked the mutt came over to him, slowly sniffing at the air, he sighed and dropped another burger in the pan, flipping the first one out onto the floor. The dog grabbed it and ran off, his claws scratching the floor. Or hers- Bobby realized he didn't know which it was.

He didn't know much about dogs in general, having never trusted himself with so much as a goldfish, except when he had trusted himself with a wife, her smile, her humming, or when he had let two boys break down the walls he'd built up. He knew how those had turned out, even Rufus, who you would think could take care of himself, he had managed to break. Probably would be kinder to shove the mutt out the front door.

He went up stairs and paused outside of the room he knew he had to enter, he hadn't gone into in months, taking a deep breath and thinking only about that dumb mutt, he pushed open the door.

The two army cots the boys had slept on were still there, books ranging from preschool to college level reading had been shelved on the bookcase wherever they would fit. Shoved under Sam's cot was a basket of toys, it had been years since their use, but Bobby never threw out anything. A gun was over Dean's cot, should be cleaned and reloaded Bobby thought. Should have given them real beds,they shouldn't have needed to sleep on army cots, they weren't soldiers, not that anyone had ever told them that- He shook his head, the mutt, he reminded himself and went to the bookcase, scanning through the piles of books that Sam had read for school, or had grabbed off the shelf back when he was very little and would still do that, begging Bobby to buy it for him.

Bobby grabbed all the books on dogs he saw, and headed downstairs, sitting himself down on the couch, he went first to the book looked the most promising, _How to Take Care for your New Pet_. The cover showed a girl of around nine holding on to a very fluffy puppy. He opened it, and started reading.

He stared at the last page for a second longer before closing the book, "Alright, it says here that I need to take you on a walk." He said to the mutt before realizing it wasn't in the room.

He walked out and found it in the kitchen, "Right, time for your walk...You don't have a leash, or a collar do you?"

"Or a name," he muttered to himself as he got into the car.

"Did you get a pet?" The cashier asked him smiling, as she rang up his stuff, "That will be good for you, I worry about you all alone up there, those nephews of yours not visiting anymore, wasn't easy for me when my boys stopped coming over, but I got my grandkids now, get one weekend a month with them. How have you been, last time you were here looked like you had hit the bottle a little bit too much if you ask me? You know your always welcome at our Over Forty Friday Nights!" She smiled at him "That will be 29.87" he handed her the cash, and went to the car, throwing the stuff in the passenger seat, he took a deep breath. " Nosy Busybody." He grumbled. He should have drunk more before coming to town, then he wouldn't need to remember this conversation. Wouldn't need to see Dean and Sam at every corner, hear Dean hushing Sam, telling him not to bother uncle Bobby...Why hadn't he done something?

He should have talked to Dean made him see what was wrong with their father, should have pulled the trigger on John long ago - he pushed away the thought before it could carry him too far.

He drove back up the house and pushed open the door, finding the dog lying on his couch, it jumped to its feet as it saw him, "Come on mutt." He said walking slowing towards it, it bared its teeth. He took another step, it took a step back. " Hold still." He jumped forwards trusting his years of hunting to make him faster than a dog- He was wrong, the dog easily jumped to the side, and he slid past, he turned back around and pulling on all of his hard earned hunter instincts he dived at the dog again this time managing to drag it and fasten the collar around its neck before letting the dog go, it ran until it was jerked back my the leash attached to the collar "Ha, you thought I was that easy to fool?" Bobby snorted," come on, let's go"

He tugged the leash. The dog did not move. "You want to go on a walk? Dumb mutt." He managed to drag the dog outside but gave up on anything more than that, he tied it to the porch and let it be, going back inside he went to the fridge, and reached for a beer, but the phone was ringing. He sighed "Not a single second of peace and quiet." He picked up the phone "Whatdayouwant?"

"Bobby?" It was a young voice, a hunter he'd met a little over a year ago when they had first gotten into the life. "What do you know about Bigfoot?"

"It's not Bigfoot- what do you have ?" He asked already moving towards the books to begin the research.

They began to fall into a comfortable pattern, he would give the dog part of his breakfast. Then he would chain it outside as he answered phone calls, only at night would he allow himself to drink until he fell asleep.

Something wet was on his face, the knife failed to be under his pillow, in fact his pillow failed to be there, he was on his couch, the mutt was licking his face he shoved it away, knocking over a bottle of rum as he did so, the dog began to drink it. He expected it to stop after it tasted it, but it didn't "Like that do you, Boy?" He asked "Rum, Uh, good as name as any." But he reached down to pick up the bottle, careful, he thought to himself, the dog is better off without you." As though hearing his thoughts Rum followed him into the kitchen and tilted its head waiting for his breakfast.

"Why do you bother staying around?" He asked it, "last owner wouldn't take you back? I can't be any better than them."

He shook his head, it wasn't like the dog was going to answer him. After they ate he went out to the car and got dog put it's paws on the window and whined, he opened the door "What-" but the dog had already jumped past him into the car and was sitting in the passenger seat. Rum didn't want to leave him he realized, didn't want to go back to the owner that had left him, he thought that Bobby was better than that, he had picked Bobby. "You're coming?" He asked Rum, the dog just tilted his head at him. "Dumb Mutt"

 _A/N this took way longer than I planned for it to there will be a part three and then it will be over, I have no idea when I will have the third part up. Rumfields is the name of the dog that was lying on his car in Devil's Trap which is the first episode we see Bobby in, the dog is never shown again. I decided that the "field" part of the name was added later._


	3. Devil's Trap

Life returned to normal, hunting, phones, repeat. Rumfield went everywhere with him. On hunts, and When he went shopping, rumfield was by his side.

He thought of the Winchester boys of course, just as he thought of his wife, and all the people he had failed to save. Their voices would only shut up after he drowned them with a bottle of hunter's helper, but he had accepted the fact that they were gone, and he would never know what happened to them.

Something was up through, this year had been the busiest in his life, with 27 demon sightings. Not to mention ghosts and monsters galore. He knew there was something coming. He had let the dog out on his chain and was sitting down to study again the demons, the places and the sighs and try to find some rhyme or reason to them. When he heard a knock on the door, he walked over to it and pulled it open. "What?"

The two men standing there,they looked awkward to say the least, The shorter one, dropped his fist which had still been held up like he was going to knock again. They glanced at each other before the taller one cleared his throat "Hey, Bobby."

Somehow all he managed to get out was "Boys?"

Sam looked worried. "It's Sam and Dean Winchester? Remember us?"

"What do you think I am, senile? Of course I remember you, get in here."

They came in and Bobby once again felt the weight of years between. Dean finally cleared his throat "Bobby we need help, our dad got into trouble."

So their Daddy was in trouble, what else would send them running back to him. "What's the trouble?"

"Demons have him, and they are after us and the colt." Sam said.

"You boys have the colt?"

Sam looked proud "Yeah, so we can finally shoot the demon." There was a glint in his eye that hadn't been there before, pure hatred

Bobby looked at Sam and wondered where the boy who didn't care for hunting had gone. "Right, well I know a thing or two about Demons."

He pulled a book off the selves and handed it to Sam "Key of Solomon, get a demon in that, they won't get out."

Sam started flipping through the book, and Bobby looked at Dean "Care to give me a bit more of a run down? Bit more about this demon?"

"Her name is Meg, she came after us first, a trap for Dad, and how they have Dad and they now are switching that."

Sam looks up sharply "They didn't mention a trade Dean, for all we know-"

"Stop, Sam, just stop!" There it was again, that difference between them, Sam not acting like he cared for their father one way or another, Dean unable to even hear the possibility that he might be gone. But they had more urgent problems

"How did you get rid of her the first time?"

"Throw her off a building."

"Well that wouldn't have slowed her down much."

"Yeah, we figure that out."

Bobby got paint buckets from the basement. "You think she will be coming after you?"

Sam nodded "She wants the colt, one way or another, I mean if we get a call saying they want to trade, but otherwise.."

"Assume she's coming here until proven otherwise, got it."

Sam studied an exorcism as Bobby and Dean painted a Key of Solomon on the ceiling. Bobby studied the both of them, they were worried, but who wouldn't be with a demon on their tail. They were older, but it had been six years since he had seen them. Sam was taller, but there was a change about them that went deeper than all of these: Dean had always walked like the weight of the world was on his shoulders, but now he seemed lost, like his meaning of life had vanished; Sam seemed trapped in a rage he had never had before, a look in his eyes that Bobby could see his end goals had changed: it was too much like the look in John's eyes for his taste, but he shook that thought out of his head, Sam wasn't like John, because he wouldn't sacrifice what he cared about or even caring at all, like John had.

There was an awkward silence between them as they prepared for the demon. A mixture of fear that the demon would arrive too soon or not at all, and an uneasiness with each other, and the rocky way things had ended between them. Bobby was lost in his own thoughts, he had shown John how to trap a demon years ago, so why wouldn't his sons know how? What did he have to gain from their ignorance ? Or could he just not be bothered to teach them?

"Here you go." Bobby said handing Dean a flask.

"What is this- holy water?"

"That one is. This one's whiskey." He took a drink, and handed it to Dean, as he was hardly a child anymore. Dean drank.

"Bobby, thanks. Thanks for everything. To tell you the truth, I wasn't sure if we should come."

Bobby knew what it must have taken for Dean to get those words out, even if it had been clear since he opened the door.

"Nonsense. Your Daddy needs help." And so that's what he was going to do, get that man back to them, clean up this mess John had left them just like every other time, and hope to earn a small piece of their trust back, earn a little spot in their lives back.

"Well,yeah, but last time we saw you, I mean, you did threaten to blast him full of buckshot. Cocked the shotgun and everything."

Well, Dean, had probably had a concussion by the point Bobby had gotten involved, so it made sense that the details won't perfect. Bobby was far more surprised that Dean was mentioning it at all. What did he expect Bobby to say? If you boys didn't want him back I would let the demons have him?

"Yeah, well, what can I say? John just has that effect on people."

"Yeah, I guess he does."

Bobby refused to let himself get distracted, trying to figure out the meaning of Dean's words, looking for clues about how Dean felt about his father. He only knew one thing for certain, and that is what he had to focus on.

"None of that matters now. All that matters is that you get him back." These boys wanted their father back. The one that no matter what Bobby did, he would always fall behind in Dean's eyes.

Thankful Sam spoke up at that point "Bobby, this book….I've never seen anything like it." He wouldn't have, Bobby had only picked that one up three years ago. He moved over to get a better look. Feeling himself fall into the same motions as the many times he had helped him with his homework. "Key of Solomon? It's the real deal, alright."

"And these, uh, these protective circles. They really work?"

"You get a demon it-they're trapped. Powerless. It's like a satanic roach motel."

Sam laughed for the first that Bobby had seen since the boys had come in.

Dean came over "Man, knows his stuff."

"I'll tell you something else, too. This is some serious crap you boys stepped in." He hoped that was all it was too, that they had wandered into it, not that it had sought them out. but it didn't make the feeling in his gut go away.

"Oh, yeah?" Sam asked, sounding worried "How's that?"

"Normal year, I hear of, say, three demonic possessions. Maybe four, tops."

"Yeah?" Dean asked.

"This year I heard of 27 so far. You get what I'm saying? More and more demons are walking among us-a lot more."

"Do you know why?" Sam asked.

"No, but I know it's something big. The storm's coming, and you boys, your Daddy-you are smack in the middle of it."

Both boys just nodded as though they already understood that, it didn't make Bobby feel any more comfortable with the situation.

Bobby heard Rumsfeld barking and went to the window, the demon shouldn't be here yet, but that mutt didn't bark unless there was something wrong "Rumsfeld" He muttered.

The barks cut off into a whine.

"What is it?" He muttered to himself scanning for his mutt. Rumsfeld chain was broken, he pushed aside his feelings. Which had never helped a hunter "Something's wrong."

The door broke and a Blonde women with demonic black eyes came in. "No more crap, okay?"

As Dean ran at her with the holy water, but Meg sent him flying and he crashed into a pile of books, limp. Bobby hoped he was faking.

Sam stepped in front of Bobby, idjit, did he think Bobby hadn't fought a demon before?

"I want the Colt, Sam- the real Colt - right now." Even though her eyes were black, and her voice chilled him to the bones. Bobby couldn't get the poor girl that she was in out of his head. The girl that must be screaming with no control of her body.

She seemed to be falling for their trap through, following them as they lead her into a devil's trap. "We don't have it on us." Sam said "We buried it." Bobby saw Dean get up behind the demon and had to stop himself from breathing a sigh of relief.

"Didn't I say "No more crap?" Meg asked "I swear-after everything I heard about you Winchesters, I got to tell you, I'm a little underwhelmed. First Johnny tries to pawn off a fake gun, and then he leaves the real gun with you two chuckleheads. Lackluster, men. I mean, did you really think I wouldn't find you?"

"Actually, we were counting on it." Dean said.

The demon turned to look at him in surprise, he turned his gaze to the ceiling and the devil's trap there "Gotcha." Dean said.

It was hardly easy, getting high powered demon tied to a chair, even if they where it a devil's trap, but luckily for Sam and Dean this wasn't Bobby's first rodeo and they were able to dump enough holy water on her to make her sit in a chair and let them tie her up.

Then Bobby left the boys watching her to salt every entrance, they sure didn't need anymore demons showing up. When he came back to report this news to the boys, Dean stood up to start questioning the demon. "Where's our father, Meg?" He asked.

Bobby watched as she teased him, watched as Dean grow in angry, hatred. Watched Dean, desperate needing to know where his father was, his need to be able to save him. And Bobby hated himself for hoping the demons had already killed him. Hated himself for wanting them freed of him, because Dean would be in pain either way, and even if he was dead, Dean would never be free of his father.

When Dean hit her, said she wasn't a girl Bobby realized the truth and a shot of hatred for John shot through him. "Dean." He said on his feet without realizing it.

They both followed him.

"She's lying. He's not dead." Dean said, seeming to have no other thought in his head.

"Dean, you got to be careful with her. Don't hurt her."

"Why?" Dean asked. And Bobby knew his hunch was right, John knew all about demons, he was obsessed with them, so it was by choice that his sons didn't know about possession that the demons they meet won't really demons at all. A choice that could only have one reason behind it. So that his sons would never show mercy, never pause, never have to consider the human life, because they didn't even know it was there. A choice that to John would make sense, because to him, a human life was never worth losing a kill.

"She's possessed. That's a human possessed by a demon." Bobby said "Can't you tell?" He asked, party to tell them it was common knowledge and partly because he was still in shock they didn't know.

"Are you trying to tell me there's an innocent girl trapped somewhere in there?" Dean asked.

Bobby nodded, and Dean looked at Meg. "That's actually good news." There it was that part of Dean that wasn't John, the bit that cared about saving people, that bit that cared.

Sam found an exorcism and the boys started using it the demon twisted in pain, but Bobby knew the girl inside wouldn't be harmed, unless she was already dead. Which demons did for kicks, breaking their meat suits neck, stabbing themselves or jumping off a building- she was dead he realized the boys had said she was throw off a building.

Dean had gotten the demon to break, to Bobby's surprise but then it wouldn't be the first demon he met not in a hurry to get another one way ticket downstairs. "Sam!"

But Sam didn't finish staring at both Dean and the Demon with an unsure expression. Bobby couldn't hear what Sam said, but Dean responded with "She doesn't know."

"She lied."

"Sam, there's an innocent girl trapped somewhere in there. We've got to help her."

Well, now was the time to tell them. "You're gonna kill her."

"What?" Dean said, turning to look at Bobby.

"You said she fell from a building. That girl's body is broken." Broken like his own wife's, sinking to the ground after the demon left it. "The only thing keeping her alive is that demon inside." The gasps, the blood pouring onto his hands and he tried to stop the wounds he made from killing her. "You exorcise it- that girl is going to die."

"Listen to me, both of you, we are not gonna to leave her like that."

"She is a human being." Bobby pleaded with him, only able to see his own wife's body, not wishing that on this girl, no older than Sam.

"And we're gonna to put her out of her misery. Sam, finish it."

Sam was uncertain, looking between Bobby and Dean, and then to Meg.

"Finish it." Dean ordered, sounding exactly like his father.

So Sam did. The demon jerked around until it let out one final scream. And left it a cloud of black smoke back to the pit in belonged in. Bobby stared at the girl, praying for some sign of life. She lifted her head.

"She still alive." Dean said "Call 911. Get some water and blankets."

Bobby didn't even pause to remind him he had been doing this before Dean was even born. He dashed off, flying through the motions, hoping to save what he couldn't before. Demons were rare, but everytime he exorcised one, he wondered if it would make up for killing his wife.

Coming back with the drink he looked at the weak body knowing she wouldn't make it, Sam and him wrapped her in the blanket, while Dean gave her a final drink, she died her final words helping them.

"You boys better hurry up and bet it. Before the paramedics get here."

"What are you gonna tell them?" He asked

"You think you guys invented lying to the cops?" Bobby asked, sure in Dean's mind it had been some genius idea of his father's. "I'll figure something out." He handed the Key of Solomon to Sam "Here take this. You might need it." If their Daddy hadn't told them anything about demons they need to catch up and fast, as they were heading into a trap full of them.

"Thanks." Sam said.

"Thanks…." Dean said "For everything. Be careful, alright?" Bobby knew what he was saying, in the Winchester way he was thanking him for years that he had cared for them. He was apologizing for the years that had passed without them. He was saying it because he didn't believe he was coming back.

"You just go find your Dad. And when you do, you bring him around, would you? I won't even try to shoot him this time." Bobby said. Giving Dean what he needed once more, hope and a feeling of certainty that he would succeed no matter how unlikely it was.

They left, but Bobby had a feeling deep down he would see them again. So he turned he had things to do, like lying to the paramedics about a young girls body in his living room, and burying his dog- no that wasn't right, he would burn him, the dog that had stayed loyal for so many years, hunting by his side. It didn't matter if the dog couldn't come back as a ghost, he was a hunter and would burn like one. And So Bobby watched the impala drive away once again.

AN : _Thank you all for reading. This is the last chapter. Bringing us back to the story we all know and love. I do not own Supernatural. and many of the lines in this are from the show itsself. I hope you enjoyed and please review._


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